Hi,.. I’m in the process of trying to leave my controlling boyfriend… This is a little long thanks for taking the time to read..or at least skim this 
It has been difficult to leave him for a number of reasons… Major one being I don’t have any friends or family within a 1000 mile radius… always end up giving in to “lets go out to eat”… or something,
And of course as anyone knows who has been in this situation it can be very difficult to leave when things are great in the relationship 70% of the time. When he isnt accusing me or being paranoid and controlling he is super sweet, treats me excellent, we laugh a lot and get along great.
Its that 30% that just wont change though… It’s:
constant accusations, accuses me of lying about stupid things, accuses me of cheating when i wouldnt dream of it, gets mad if i don’t answer the phone when im showering, working, etc,.
He says he will kill me if i ever cheated on him, reads receipts when he finds them, constantly wants to be checking my phone, email, facebook, accuses me when I get wrong numbers or even spam mail that i delete…saying im hiding something, gets mad anytime i go to buy groceries or basic necessities, saying “i enjoy going out all the time”…like im looking for guys or something.
He gets mad with normal dialogue and normal questions, misinterpreting, changing my words and then blowing things out of proportion.
He has spied on me at my job and doing grocery shopping, forbids me to talk to anyone at my job and gets mad even if the talk is work related.
He admitted to me that in the distant past he has physically abused his ex and his kids.. and he shows all the signs of in the future physically abusing me…he even told me a couple times that he would like to hit me for “things ive done”. When he is mad he has told me i don’t deserve to be treated well and that he wouldn’t care if he never saw me again, ….later saying sorry and it was only because he was mad…gets mad if i turn my head to look at ANYTHING in public…saying i was looking at a guy.
I have tried probably 15 times to leave him and it has resulted in the following: (i guess its classic)
Crying (extensively) pleading, taking things of mine so that i wont go (car keys, laptop, GPS…things of value), promising to change, he has climbed on top of my car, laid down in FRONT of my car, puts his foot in front of the tire, says he will kill himself,(i dont believe it but there is always that doubt) promises that he will find me wherever i go and that he will never stop following me, waiting for me, begging me.
I know he will not change and that i need to get out now, but since i have not been successful yet i just thought it will help me leave him for good if i have the support of people telling me i’m doing the right thing…encouraging me… i dont really have anyone in my life i can talk openly about this with.
all feedback will be greatly appreciated, i need all the support i can get .
THANK YOU SO MUCH
((hug))